Brass Tacks

(Pl. N.) Getting down to the essential facts; basics - and doing something about it
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*image from therapistaid.com

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Changing Habits

Josephine Honsa September 12, 2017

HUGE DISCLAIMER!  I'm not a psychoanalyst or therapist!  I read a lot of stuff.  That being said...

Getting organized, dieting, quitting smoking, etc. all really come down to changing habits.  You can read a book or blogs but you will, most likely, still have difficulties breaking that habit.  Don't beat yourself up!  We need to figure out, first, why we've developed this habit. Habits form because, as basic as anything, any situation will cause a response.  Our reptilian brain, as it's called, controls our primal instincts.  Fear, anger, aggression, survival instinct are all rooted in this part of the brain.  This lower part of the brain is as base and primal as it gets! Any thought that causes fear, uncertainty, anxiety, or depression gets redirected to this survival part of the brain.  Our reaction to this is "fight, flight, or freeze".  (I love the 3 Fs.  I got this from Carley Hauck founder of Living Well Awake.)  When it comes to dealing with our piles of stuff we usually fly or freeze.   These reactions are why this part of the brain also controls our habits. Whenever you feel discomfort it is the perfect time to discover why.  Once we discover the "why" we can change our thinking pattern. Our brains cycle through a situation by thought, a feeling about that thought, and then behaving based off of that feeling.  Here's an example...

Situation:  I have a huge pile of papers on my desk. 

Thought:  "I don't want to deal with that huge pile of papers."

Feeling:  Dread;  I'm afraid of what I'm going to find in that pile. Shame; I can't believe I'm so lazy to let it become like this. Frustration;  I just don't want to deal with that pile!

Behavior:  Adding more paper to the pile then moving past pile and ignoring it. HABIT.

So, then how do we change this habit? 

We need to redirect the negative feeling into a more positive feeling. Your brain can and will redirect itself from old negative thoughts to new more affirmative ones. 

Situation:  I have a huge pile of papers on my desk.

Thought:  Stupid papers. But, I would really benefit if my counter was clear.  No mess. More counter space.  

Feeling:  Serenity; My space can breathe. Comfort; I can breathe.  Satisfaction; I did it! Confidence; I did it and I can do it again!    

Behavior:  I tackle the pile! * Once you decide to tackle that pile you'll probably realize that most of the papers were junk mail or bills already debited from your account.  You can easily and with little time tear those things up and toss 'em out of your life!

This takes a lot of conscious effort but once you've got this you've dug out the toughest root in the soil.  Those positive feelings are the best reward you can give yourself!  And, damnit you deserve it!  Remember my favorite motto: It's simple but it ain't easy.

Also, guys, I have a few really unhealthy habits and wrestle with them constantly.  Only when we are really ready to change them will we really change them.  Let's remember that and be nice to ourselves in our own process and progress. xoxojo

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Brass Tacks

(Pl. N.) Getting down to the essential facts; basics - and doing something about it

Brass Tacks is a Los Angeles based professional organizer firm headed by Joey. Joey has helped many people organize those scary places like closets, desks, boxes filled with random objects to various other storage and sentimental spaces. Her purpose is to  de-clutter and demystify these little - or big - black holes.  She brings a let’s get down to “brass tacks” attitude to her work.

Brass Tacks | , Los Angeles, CA, USA

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